Joined: 08 February 2007 United Kingdom Posts: 160 Gender: Female
Posted: 19 April 2007 at 8:58pm | IP Logged
i have to say firstly i am very embaresssed posting this but i need to tell someone. apologise in advance if this is tmi.
me and my dp enjoy a healthy sex life or so i thought till this afternoon, we were in bed ahem! and dp was fantasising abot having another lady join us (3some) after sex i asked him if he meant it and he said he would consider it.
was wondering what you guys think of this we have been together 5 years and our daughter is nearly 1 year old.
i don't know what to think...aren't i enough for him?
Joined: 13 May 2006 United Kingdom Posts: 1688 Gender: Female
Posted: 19 April 2007 at 9:11pm | IP Logged
i dont think that its the fact that your not enough for him hun its just a fantasy and i would think that every man would love that even though some of them wouldent admit it,
tell him how you felt when he said that to you,
my fantasy would to sleep with robbie william but i dont see it ever happening.
Joined: 11 June 2005 United Kingdom Posts: 8379 Gender: Female
Posted: 19 April 2007 at 10:32pm | IP Logged
It is alot of men's fantasy! Most men like the idea of 2 women together, often while they are watching! I personally would have a fit if dh suggested it, as well he knows! lol I would discuss it seriously with your partner, and let him know how it made you feel. But yes, as has been said spicing it up, seems to work wonders in a relationship, it did in mine.
Joined: 07 June 2006 United Kingdom Posts: 4041 Gender: Female
Posted: 19 April 2007 at 11:14pm | IP Logged
Is that the best he could come up with lol...thats the most typical male fantasy going. Sorry.
As has been said, fantasy is always safer than actual reality. Nobody gets hurt (as such) with fantasy, and talking about them etc during can get both of you all hot under the collar..depending on the fantasy that is. Whereas depending on your own personal views the reality is always different and nothing like what you may have fantasised about and guaranteed someone will get hurt along the way, intentional or not..it happens.
There are loads of different ways to spice things up.
Im going through a 'dry' spell so to speak, im all rampant (big shock there lol) however, hubby just doesnt seem to be in the mood..and needless to say 6 weeks is a long time to not be in the mood. Ive tried all sorts of stuff but its been a no go. I have at times wondered if hes going off me, he says hes not, just that hes tired bleat bleat. I wouldnt blame him if he did for a bit, what with everything thats been going on, what with now only having one boob and going through chemo, being as bald as a coot (but no longer, getting hair back, where there should be hair again lol) and everything else. However, i still need that side of things to feel fully alive if that makes sense. Mind you...have dusted off the old reliable rabbit..and if he won't...well I know a bunny that will lol.
Joined: 12 June 2005 United Kingdom Posts: 3126 Gender: Female
Posted: 19 April 2007 at 11:32pm | IP Logged
i know deep down carl loves to think of this but he knows theres no chance in a million it would ever happen as long as hes with me for a start i couldnt bare to see him with his hands on another woman and not only that it wouldnt do nothing for me and it would turn bad in the long run (i know 2 people who have done it and they now have split up), i would try spicing things up (to be honest i shall try spicing mine up lol its been abit down-hill for a while my fault not his pmsl) - goodluck have a chat with him hun, xx jue xx
Joined: 12 June 2005 United Kingdom Posts: 8737 Gender: Female
Posted: 20 April 2007 at 8:26am | IP Logged
I wouldn't worry about it too much, it's just a fantasy.
I've wondered myself what it would be like to have a threesome, but wouldn't do it in reality. The closest I ever got was a drunken snog with a girl - it was nice, but it doesn't make me want to do it again!
Listen, sex does get boring and predictable between couples, but it takes both of you to turn it around and improve things. Communicating with one another is key. Try new things, be honest and safe with each other and enjoy.
Joined: 04 May 2007 United States Posts: 17 Gender: Female
Posted: 18 May 2007 at 7:55pm | IP Logged
Oh sweetie don't worry. I had a boyfriend that told me the same thing and I was pretty hurt and upset by it. When I told him he said he didn't mean to hurt me, but it was a "fantasy" of his. He said he would never do it if it made me uncomfortable. It's something different and new to a guy. It doesn't mean he loves you any less or doesn't like the sex. It just means he's a guy and at times is a little insensitive and says things before he's thought them through. If this is really bothering you, you should bring it up and talk to him about it. I would be very upset and hurt if my fiance said something like that. Take care and good luck... and remember, IT'S NOT YOU!!!
Joined: 16 July 2007 United States Posts: 2 Gender: Male
Posted: 16 July 2007 at 5:07pm | IP Logged
Hi people nice meeting you all. Today is my first day here and this thread really caught my eye. I havent yet found a forum to introduce myself in so I will do it here now while I am at it. My name is Anthony and I'm an expecting father, My girlfriend's nickname is Nina and our baby is due on January 28th. Today she is 3 months pregnant. I am super Excited!... Ok, but now to give Ruthlou My 2 cents, From a man's point of view.
In my opinion, i think every man would like to have 2 women in the bed at once, it is every man's fantasy. I myself was a part of that group of men a few months back. But that was only til i found out my girl got pregnant. My girlfriend is bi, so mind you, i can easily pull it off if I wanted because i know she's willing to. How ever, i cant do it.. because I know I'd feel guilty and because I just cant see myself doing anything like that with anybody else but my girl. Its just not right and my advice to you is not to do it. I think it will attract problems to your relationship, he might then think its ok to cheat on you because he wont feel as guilty or he might end up trying to pick up females himself from the internet for the both of you with out your permission. So as my advice, Spice things up! But ONLY you and ur dp! NOT with another female. Good Luck ;)
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