Joined: 11 June 2005 United Kingdom Posts: 3865 Gender: Female
Posted: 22 December 2007 at 4:36pm | IP Logged
Well
guess the title says it all, just as I thought things were starting to
go right I've been very much mistakened. Billy's grandmother (his
dad's mum) apparently was playing sick jokes letting us believe she was
giving her blessing for him to come and see us. She's not decided to
say she wont accept it and he cant come and see me and Billy. He has
taken it like a pinch of salt and had a go at me for cussing his mum
saying it's his mum I'm sl@gging off and he wont accept that. So
here's to a f***ed up christmas and new year and having the kids heads
as well as mine messed up. She can rot in hell and so can he coz I
aint having my kids messed around like this again!
Joined: 30 June 2005 United Kingdom Posts: 6725 Gender: Female
Posted: 22 December 2007 at 5:59pm | IP Logged
I know how you feel Jen, and I also know that it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks you will make your own choices for what is right for you at the time! Look at Billy, look how much he has grown, how much he can do, those big goofy smiles all those milestones he has already done so nrilliantly. Jen all those things he did for you, and he is coming in leaps and bounds because of you, no one else! His daddy didnt encourage him to sit up, or stand up, or take that first nibble of toast like this morning... you did it! And you will go on to give him the very best you can and that is all he needs! The kids will come round, its time to start thinking about you and yours! Put your own wants first and do what you want when you want rather than thinking and waiting for someone else to fill in the gaps. Im only at the other end of the phone if you want to chat or just blub! See you in a few days xxxx
Joined: 24 June 2005 United Kingdom Posts: 2673 Gender: Female
Posted: 22 December 2007 at 7:28pm | IP Logged
Jen, Im so very sorry and saddened to hear this. I really hoped he'd sorted his priorities out but that wasnt meant to be. Hunny, this is not meant anything towards you and your family, but if his mother has that much of a hold over him then you are best off without him.
Still doesnt make up for the fact that she has ruined your christmas though, however, I agree with Hazel and your sis, this is Billy's first christmas and concentrate on making this the best one that he and your kids have ever had!
If I knew where he lived I'd go round and lamp him one for doing this - his mother must be some sick evil woman to do this and as I said before - you are better off out of that one.
Chin up hunny - you know where I am if you want to talk xxxxx
Joined: 11 June 2005 United Kingdom Posts: 3865 Gender: Female
Posted: 22 December 2007 at 7:53pm | IP Logged
am just so dam fed up now, just as i thought things were starting to look up its all thrown back in my face. I cant stop crying now, I thought I was getting better but I just feel at rock bottom again. I dont want christmas, I dont want a happy new year. I've had enough...he's just called me a cheating cu*t because I went mad and sent his mum an email with a few home truths. It's over now, well and truely, he's just lost his last chance coz I aint ever going through this again and as for his pathetic * of a mother she can rot in hell. How can anyone do this, I dont know who's worse, her because she's made sure she has such a hold over him or him for letting it happen. He aint even bothered to send billy a card, he's never sent nothing for him.
Joined: 11 June 2005 United Kingdom Posts: 8635 Gender: Female
Posted: 22 December 2007 at 8:06pm | IP Logged
Jen, I know no amount of 'bummers' or anything like it will help, so I'm just sending loads of warm hugs for you to have that extra special christmas and new year with your kids all on your own, as you are the one parent of any of the children that have been there for them. No man is worth the time and patience and effort you have put in and got nothing in return (except the little bundles that you have). Enjoy your time with them, it will never come again, and just think they are all yours and you don't have to share them!
Joined: 07 June 2006 United Kingdom Posts: 4141 Gender: Female
Posted: 23 December 2007 at 9:32am | IP Logged
Steady laaaady.....christmas isnt ruined and neither is your new year.
Theres you...and theres your kids....they love you...you love them..you give them all the love, time and every part of your soul that is humanely possible. No-one else but YOU can give them that. Your kids love you more than anyone else in the world...and thats what counts.
I only know you through here...buuuuuut youve done more for yourself and your children than anyone I know. You've had more set backs than you can shake a stick at (and thats saying something), yet every time youve picked yourself up, dusted yourself off and done something amazing.
Blokes chick, they come and go...but your childrens love for you will last forever.
Joined: 06 September 2007 United Kingdom Posts: 538 Gender: Female
Posted: 23 December 2007 at 10:07am | IP Logged
I agree with all of the above. Billy wont loose out because he has you. If his dad is such a waste of space you re both better off without him. As for Christmas being ruined? Nah, you still have all your lovely kids and it will be you watching their cute lil faces when they open their presents, and I think the new year will be a good time to start fresh, forget the loosers in the past and look forward to a bright a breezy spring.
The only looser with no future is Billys dad coz he is going to miss out BIGTIME on that cute lil boy growing up. Children get to a certain age and make up their own minds about people, my kids are 10 7+7 and they can already see that their dad is useless, and I never ever put him down (in front of them anyway!!) but they have decided that because he has let them down on sooo many occassions
Dry your eyes poppet and enjoy Christmas, I ll be here if you want to chat.
Joined: 07 June 2007 United Kingdom Posts: 1220 Gender: Female
Posted: 23 December 2007 at 1:23pm | IP Logged
Jen i agree with all thats been said here and i also know that i dont really understand what your going through as a parent but i am a child from a one parent family my 'sperm donor' walked out when i was 7 by time i was 8 i knew he was useless and now i protect my mum alot (more than she wants anyway) but i wouldnt be who i am without her.He had no input in my childhood and in all honesty im glad because my mum really was better off with out him .
Your children love you and will thank you one day for being the best thing in their lives.x
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Topic: he wont be meeting his daddy afterall
I know how you feel Jen, and I also know that it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks you will make your own choices for what is right for you at the time! Look at Billy, look how much he has grown, how much he can do, those big goofy smiles all those milestones he has already done so nrilliantly. Jen all those things he did for you, and he is coming in leaps and bounds because of you, no one else! His daddy didnt encourage him to sit up, or stand up, or take that first nibble of toast like this morning... you did it! And you will go on to give him the very best you can and that is all he needs! The kids will come round, its time to start thinking about you and yours! Put your own wants first and do what you want when you want rather than thinking and waiting for someone else to fill in the gaps. Im only at the other end of the phone if you want to chat or just blub! See you in a few days xxxx
