Off Topic Forums

Posted: 05 May 2008 at 6:28pm | IP Logged

Hi all,

We are experiencing a really difficult time with the neighbours, the ones not joined but next to us are a couple with 2 older kids aged about 40. The female adult in the family spies on us ALL the time, She comes out and pretends to do things if we are outside and watches us the whole time, if we have guests(not often as she has been abusive to them all!) she comes out to watch us talking, and tonight took the cake!!

I was pouring a glass of wine (im stressed and depressed) and cooking a pizza and i catch her STARING through my window, so i remarked to Andy "i'm having wine, it's not a crime!" and she never stopped lookin through my windows, i am feeling quite intimidated by her and i am getting more and more andgry and ready to explode!

Andy took Diesel out to "do his buiz" and she stared at him the entire time and then watched him walk back to the house and tiptoed to see if he had picked it up!! Then remarked he hadn't, he has now but needed to bring him back indoors as he is poorly! She never gave him a chance and i have no doubt she will log that and complain to the housing! I am furious and feel we are being stalked! She obviously watches us a lot or else the complaints wouldn't be thick and fast!

When does it become criminal? When is it harassment or stalking? I am desperate to get help and someone to tell her she mustn't keep doing this to us, she is playing games with my head and i am so SO close to losing it!

I just want to live without being watched and have every move logged and analyzed! It's none of her buisness what i do in my house and yet i have no privacy!

She uses next doors access to go to their house which i am SURE she can't do! And when she does she gawps through my window as the access runs by it!

Help me i am so scared of losing it and making me the innocent look guilty! She makes us feel 2" tall!

Now back to my wine and i have loads to get through

Posted: 05 May 2008 at 6:50pm | IP Logged

Has she no life of her own, like ?

What an extremely sad woman she is !! I'd stick two fingers up at her next time and start keeping a log book of all she does to you.

Posted: 05 May 2008 at 10:06pm | IP Logged

I would also suggest keeping a log of their behaviour too, i know you shouldn't have to waste your time on pathetic people with nothing better to be doing, but at least you will have something to throw back at them when they try their next accusation (sp?)
If you could collect as much evidence as possible from video off your mobiles, a diary with dates and times of whats been said/ done and when.. then take it to your housing assosiation and police station, they should be able to see clearly that your being victimised in your own home, which is not aceptable.

Please do try to keep calm though hun, im sure she is just itching for you to react and explode.. only giving her more ammunition to throw at you, which is precisely what you dont need.
This is no way of life for you and your family, so keep fighting and fingers crossed the end of this farce will be over soon.
x-x-x
  

Posted: 05 May 2008 at 11:28pm | IP Logged

Have to say mum of 4's advice re keeping a log is a good one.

I'm not well up on the law re "stalking/harassment" legally.

Snibbug, Did you get to read my post a few days ago with the list of independant local housing ombudsman offices?

Posted: 07 May 2008 at 2:26pm | IP Logged

Thanks ladies,

I had the police out today and they spoke to me, then her and came back to me pointing the fat finger at me saying its my fault, and its a nice community and i should respect it including the garden which was like that when we got here argh...needless to say complete waste of time and effort if the law shrug it off...she played the " i am nice and respectable" act and got away with it.

So for now she can continue to spy on us, and abuse our guests. The cop said in the 20 years he was a beat here he never heard of a neighbour dispute, and i have bought the "rough" to the village...how very nice of him to assume that WE are rough people...Andy won't say boo to a goose!

They have taken it all at face value, young couple must be trouble...it is infact young couple from rough past trying to make a decent life for kids!

Oh god i am so SO very depressed, why us? I need to calm down before i get stupidly hysterical.

Posted: 07 May 2008 at 6:19pm | IP Logged

thanks for replying,

zo, the garden is clear, no rubbish/mess just a dug up lawn where we had hired someone to dig the old weeds up ready to plant grass seed...its gonna get worse before it gets better...the guy next door when we first moved in told us it took him 7 years to get his garden sorted and he's still working on it now! Yet we are expected to have it done a lot quicker?! Makes no sense to me!

I have a log of times dates and events and have sent that in to Rooftop before, and nothing happened! I even have photographic evidence of the things they have done to inconvinience me and my family...also witnesses that have heard her shouting at me and andy in front of my kids, and also at visitors that have came to mine before...One mate was so offended by her remarks about his weight he won't visit anymore, i have to meet him in town or at his! Even the pizza delivery service we had before heard her mouthing at andy and they said "she's crazy" and they don't speak much english!

I personally think i have more than enough evidence against them, but none of the officials are interested in looking at it or speaking with the witneses! Quick enough to slam me though, just because my garden fits the profile of a problem family...and i cant stress enough it is work in progress that was left in a disgraceful state to begin with!

I feel like i am screaming from deep inside myself and no one can hear me! That cop that came out had all the people skills of a wild cat, didn't listen to me, looked glazed over and in a daydream and was very quick to judge my actions.

On a really serious note i am trying so hard not to do anything stupid but my head is telling me otherwise as if i am such a bad person as they make me out to be then i really shouldn't be here and may as well rid everyone of the hassle that seems to follow me.

Maybe everyone is right, maybe i do deserve it.