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Forum Start Madmums | Pregnancy and Parenting Forums » Off Topic Forums » Chit Chat

wedding stress, outlaws need gagging Topic: wedding stress, outlaws need gagging

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offline nicki.smee
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Posted: 15 April 2008 at 5:13pm | IP Logged Quote nicki.smee

Hey.. I have just been going through our guest list for the wedding as the invites go out at the end of the week. Im starting to get a bit stressed about it all.. to begin with i only wanted a small wedding, family and close friends, but it has now turned in to everyone and there dog, mainly because we have had the "you can't invite them without inviting such and such" etc.. its mainly from my mum and the outlaws.

I have now decided that i don't want children to attend the service (apart from our kids), but they are welcome to the reception.. that hasn't gone down to well either. I just feel i have no say over who i would like at the wedding. Its caused a few arguments between Simon and I, not good.

I have now cut the list down from nearly 70 to 30, like how i originally wanted it, small.. but its like choosing favourites.. and i feel like i can't win, plus im starting to get the not so suttle comments again..

Im gettin so stressed with it all, i really do wanna run away and get married in Cyprus.. makes things easier.. if you can't afford to come, tough.. lol. sounds a bit nasty really hehe

Anyways.. i needed to vent this before i bew up about it. Who ever said getting married was easy needs shooting!!!

 

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offline 19731hazy
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Posted: 15 April 2008 at 5:18pm | IP Logged Quote 19731hazy

Oh boy !!!! Memories of this time last year coming back to me now, lol.

My sister is doing the same thing re kids at her wedding next year and I do feel that it is up to the bride and groom to say what's what.

I would just do what you and your hubby to be want to do and to heck with others. It's your big day, not theirs.

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offline zanynut
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Posted: 15 April 2008 at 5:54pm | IP Logged Quote zanynut

lol i think organising a birthday party is a nightmare! I didn't have a say over/in my first wedding my ex's mum organised it (felt very much like a shoot gun wedding).

If my dp ever gets divorced then i hope to be more involved and maybe hire someone to make sure it goes smoothly so i can enjoy the run up etc.... looks and seems a good idea on the wedding channels etc. lol

Hay ho but i think i might be dreaming lol

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offline bopbop
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Posted: 15 April 2008 at 6:18pm | IP Logged Quote bopbop

I have to say as we where paying for our wedding and i cant be doing with family polatics that i said we are getting married in mauritus if you want to come your more than welcome and if you dont so be it. Had a very fab stress free wedding and for me personally wouldnt have any other way as i have seen so many friends and family just go through weeks and weeks of not stop stress and hassle and then all the back biting that goes before and after nightmare.

Also i have 4 darling los and i prefer it if they dont get invited to weddings as it means i can get dressed up nice and not worry about sticky fingers everywhere and actually have an adult conversation without being interupted for a drink or taking to the toilet or just a complete tantrum and a couple of times i have actually said to the couple if they are invited that they wouldnt come to the church but would pick them up afterwards as los get bored and then ruin it for everyone i think but have been slated for that. At the end of the day its YOUR wedding so do what makes YOU happy as you will never please everyone xxx

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offline mum of 4!
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Posted: 15 April 2008 at 6:27pm | IP Logged Quote mum of 4!

Nicki, I would be far more suprised if you wasn't complaining about people interfering and 'trying' to help you arrange your wedding to be honest lol
It was the same for us when we got married, parents wanting to invite all and sundry along, and not considering the amount in our food budget, space etc!
Sometimes, family memebers only try to help or think they have to be involved as a tradition.. but stuff tradition lol if you only want a certain number of people there... your writing the invites right????
x-x-x

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offline steph
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Posted: 15 April 2008 at 9:17pm | IP Logged Quote steph

ahhhh....you are forgetting the golden rule of you are not allowed to organise your own wedding...or is that just what mums and soon to be outlaws reckon.

We had a nightmare with ours, and my sister had the same thing...however shes standing her ground and point blank has refused to invite certain members of the family, which is a fair one, which means other members of the family wont go, which is great in her mind as she didnt want them there in the first place so its no skin off her nose.

Its tough...just grit your teeth, count to ten and have a massive beer at the end of it all

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offline Funchick
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Posted: 16 April 2008 at 8:19am | IP Logged Quote Funchick

That was one of the reasons that me and Kev got married in secret - with just our closest friends as witnesses and my cousin/sister as cameraperson!!

We also had to pay for everyting ourselves, so it didnt cost much and that was with a pub meal and champagne afterwards!!!

If you threaten to run away to Cyprus - would they listen to you and butt out???

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