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Trying to Conceive

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Forum Start Madmums | Pregnancy and Parenting Forums » Pregnancy Forums » Trying to Conceive

How old is too old Topic: How old is too old

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offline 19731hazy
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Posted: 05 October 2007 at 4:35pm | IP Logged Quote 19731hazy

Me and Andy have talked about this for so long now and we have decided to wait until next August before TTC so we can try for a spring baby with me having SAD.

I will be 35 if we definately start trying and I'm thinking about the risks involved by that time.

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offline becky84
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Posted: 05 October 2007 at 4:45pm | IP Logged Quote becky84

I dont think there would be a huge risk to you or a baby ifyour fit and healthy if your not as healthy as you should be then be a bit cautious but have a chat to your gp see what they say then that can put your mind at rest x

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offline Vickimom
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Posted: 05 October 2007 at 7:28pm | IP Logged Quote Vickimom

I have no idea, I have found that my parenting skills and attitudes towards lo's have changed with the older I get!  I really struggled with the first 3, but more because I was too young and not ready for a family, but found this time round I am more relaxed about the lot.  As for health, if you are in good health, then fine, and if you usually have good pg's then even better.  My health, and useless mw care this last time made me realise it was definitely time for me to stop (well, that and already having 5!).  I couldn't cope either mentally or physically with another pg, but I do know the risks of problems are higher the older you get.  When I had my first I was told when I hit 30 the risks are higher, when I had these last 2 I was told it was when you were the further side of 40.  Now I'm waffling, personally no, you are not too old, if I hadn't had the older 3 (as they are the ones that tire me the most) I would be quite willing to have more!  And I turned 35 in June
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offline Dizie
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Posted: 05 October 2007 at 8:10pm | IP Logged Quote Dizie

I was 33 when I had Ella and am 35 now and trying for no 2. The risks do go up when you hit 35/36 but many, many women go on to have healthy babies well into their late 30s and early 40s onwards. When I miscarried in April, the hospital said that it was just one of those things and not necessarily anything to do with my age, weight, c-section or whatever.

I hear what you're saying about wanting to wait to try for a spring baby but one of the things that does decrease as you get older is your fertility. Ok some women will fall pg straight away but the older you get, the longer it can take. If you started say in May time, the earlier you could get a baby would be February which is not long before the clocks go forward and the SAD season comes to an end. Bearing in mind that it could take longer to conceive, it might be worth not waiting until August before trying.

I hope that makes sense, I'm not trying to be critical its just that when I fell pg in February, my baby would have been due in November which is right in the middle of the SAD season and yes it did bother me. But, I could still have used my lightbox and I could still have made sure that I got out as much as I could. Yes I think it would have been hard, and the risks of my PND re-occuring could well have been higher, but it would have been doable. For me, I think the blessing of a new baby would have outweighed the risk of depression for me - thats just me you understand. In many ways, I'm almost resigned to PND hitting me a 2nd time, but I feel much more ready to fight back next time if you know what I mean.

Whatever you decide, good luck and am sending lots of baby dust your way to store for when you decide to go for it!
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offline MumSam
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Posted: 05 October 2007 at 8:41pm | IP Logged Quote MumSam

I know if I knew back then what I knew now I wouldn't have waited.  I was 35 when I fell pregnant with Ollie.  I knew straight away I wanted another baby but Keith wanted to wait for 6 months, having little choice I agreed.  I am not saying that that the 6 months would have made a huge difference to whether I had a healthy baby or not but it certainly makes you wonder.  I am now 38 and I always thought that over 38 was too old for me personally.  Now I find myself in this position I don't actually feel any older than I did when I was 35 but unfortunately my body does.  I know other women have babies at much older ages than I am but it certainly doesn't seem to be working for me.  Personally I wouldn't wait.

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offline Lina
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Posted: 06 October 2007 at 12:05am | IP Logged Quote Lina

There are always greater risks that goes with everything..even if you are overweight underweight or under age of 18...so i think, as long as you follow up w the hv as a higher risk or more often...your not doing the wrong thing at all...its never too late.  I dont think 35 is that late at all. so happy for you.
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offline MrGreedylookalike
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Posted: 06 October 2007 at 2:34pm | IP Logged Quote MrGreedylookalike

well looking at it from purely a statistical view, and taking any emotion out of it, I think you already know the answer - you have higher risk of problems in your pregnancy/with your child and a lower risk of conceiving the older you get.  35 isn't that old but you don't know how long it might take to conceive...my younger sister has just taken 12 months to conceive and she is only 28.. 

if you started now, and got caught straight away, wouldn't you be expecting in June/July, would that not be ok for your SAD?  Or are there other factors making you want to wait?

good luck with your decision, xx

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offline HarrysMum
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Posted: 06 October 2007 at 3:03pm | IP Logged Quote HarrysMum

 I was 41 when I fell pregnant with Harry and 42 when I gave birth. I had been off the pill for 4 months.

  I always say that you are as old as you feel and my age is just a number that unfortunately keeps increasing. To be honest, I feel old because dd has just turned 16 but Harry keeps me young.

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