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Breastfeeding

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Forum Start Madmums | Pregnancy and Parenting Forums » Parenting Forums » Breastfeeding

i want to stop now! Topic: i want to stop now!

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offline LANNYNEWMUM
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Posted: 16 April 2007 at 10:09pm | IP Logged Quote LANNYNEWMUM

my son is a yr old now. i am still breast feeding but i want to stop. He has been bottle and breast feeding since 4 months of age. He goes to nursery with a bottle in the day but he hardly has any of it. If i try to bottle feed him he will try to knock the bottle or breaker out of my hand and turn to my breast. If i sit him down and give him a bottle or beaker he will have a little then crawl over to me for his breast feed!

 He still wakes in the night and the only thing that will get him bk to sleep is the breast.

If he stays at someone else's house the night he will wake and not go back to sleep for a gud 30 mins to an hr beacause he wants the breast instead. He screams his little head off.

He is a thumb sucker and has always refused a dummy.. i always keep trying him on it tho

it's like nothing will console him if he wants a breastfeed but the breast.

Also he hardly drinks at nursery...he waits to get home to me for a drink

Do i just have to put up with the crying and blatently refuse the breast? i did try this for a few days but i was soo tired from being up in the night




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offline 3smallboys
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Posted: 16 April 2007 at 11:10pm | IP Logged Quote 3smallboys

This is such a tough one for you. If you're certain that you want to stop, then the best way to do it is to just stop, and put up with the consequences! You know that he can and will take a bottle if thirsty enough, but he obviously knows that he'll get what he wants if he kicks up enough!

When I was weaning my eldest off the breast, I literally couldn't go near him when he was having a drink, because he would be reminded of what he really wanted. I had to get my dh to offer him all his drinks.

At night time, have you tried controlled crying? It is really hard to do, but if you are resolute it does work. (If you're unsure what this is, let me know and I'll send you more info, but it's late and I'm too tired to write it all down now! Basically a method of teaching children to get themselves back to sleep, but does involve listening to quite a bit of crying!) Or is there any way that someone else can go to him at night for a while, just to comfort him briefly, but so that he doesn't see you and realises that he's not going to get the breast? As I said at the start, if you're certain you want to stop, I think that you just need to stick to your guns. He will figure it out eventually if you're consistent, and will start to get what he needs from elsewhere.

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offline Lynie
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Posted: 17 April 2007 at 8:39am | IP Logged Quote Lynie

Congratulations for feeding him till this stage.  I fed my wee boy until he was a year, and Emilie until a year and 8 months, and like you just got to the point it was easier and less hassle to do it than not.  To wean them off I had to get hubby to settle them at bed times, and go out of the house, or go into another room and plug in my earphones! 

Instead of going cold turkey you could always try to wean him off one of his feeds at a time.  But, I know what you mean about the night time feeds, this was hard to do with my wee girl.  In fact, I was ill for a few days and just couldn't get up to go through to her during the night, and that's when she weaned off the night feeds.  (She's still a rubbish sleeper and wakes up crying during the night- just until we go through to her and give her a cuddle)

Good Luck!!!!
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offline Madzwalker
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Posted: 17 April 2007 at 11:31am | IP Logged Quote Madzwalker

Well done for feeding for a year, thats fantastic!

I fed until 11 months but at the end I was only offering a morning breastfeed. The evening feed was a bottle of formula and he drank water the rest of the day with a beaker.

I stopped night feeds at 8.5 months after making a decision that he no longer needed to feed through the night and it was habit. I did controlled crying and it took a week of sleepless nights but he then started sleeping through 14hours a night so I'd been right.

He self weaned as he was taking less and less milk from me in the morning. I gave him one last, special feed and I'll always remember that moment.

Good luck, shout if we can help more.

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offline bensmum
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Posted: 22 April 2007 at 10:02pm | IP Logged Quote bensmum

Hi there and well done for bfeeding for a full 12 months! I've not got much advice for you coz I bfed Ben til he was 2 1/4 yrs! And I was reluctant to stop. However I can understand where you're coming from. Maybe try distracting him when he comes for a feed, like playing with a oy or taking him out. Also get your dp to see t him at night. He won't understand that if mum is there, then why can't he have milk? Hope it all goes ok for you
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offline Lina
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Posted: 25 April 2007 at 2:50am | IP Logged Quote Lina

ohh you did swell by the way for breast feeding this long i must commend you! i had to stop at almost 2 months since my body gave up producing with my stress level and not eating...i believe you have given the best gift to b/f and whatever choice you make now is definately not a bad one!!
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