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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 12:21pm | IP Logged

I am having a very bad day and I dont know why.

I know my SPD is very very bad today, I slept badly and am in agony this morning. But I should be happy, I had a great night in with Tsena watching chick flicks last night, and I know I only have a few days to wait until injections but I cant help but feel so low, I've just got off the phone to mum in tears.

On her recommendation I am now in the conservatory with all my pillows and my feet up trying to enjoy the sun and still be comfy.

I suppose part of me is very nervous of what will happen after these injections. The pain has always got worse for a few days and I am scared that will be agony if it is any worse than this. I'm also worried it wont work as well this time, or at all, and that i'll be stuck like this.

I'm worried that if they do work I have so much to do as I have been unable to do any housework for a month - which means the house is a mess (as DH constantly reminds me).

I am down because DH and eds have gone for a walk, and are planning on spending all afternoon gardening and I cant do any of that, so I am just stuck here like a lemon, drinking morphine and feeling useless.

I am normally so good at putting the positive face on it but today I cant, I feel awful, lonely and in pain and I just want it all to stop.

Posted: 30 March 2008 at 1:42pm | IP Logged

Madz hun

It's probably nerves of it all approaching. You've never had to call on the heavy duty meds before and it's nerve wracking. You're worried about what's going to happen next and what's going to happen with dh.

I know you're worried about the after pains and it has to get worse before it gets better and i know your wondering how could it possibly get much worse and how do i keep going!!

If dh is moaning that much hun why didn't you say something!! I'm coming over monday and you can potty train eds and i'm doing your housework no arguements!!

You know i'm going to come over and look after you friday and i'll kidnap you all weekend if things are going belly up! Just remember it's natrual to be apprehensive it's very much a guessing game as to what will happen but please just try to think..... it's worked before it will again! It might take a couple of sessions at most to get you fully back on your feet but as long as you take it steady and listen to your body after them and don't go being superwoman you'll be fine hun, you've made it this far you can make it i promise x

Call me if you need anything hun XX