whats wrong with me ? - Mental Health and Depression - Health Forums - Madmums

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martha
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Posted: 29 August 2006 at 4:42pm \| IP Logged

Whats wrong with me ???

I am always down in the dumps....I seem to go from highs to lows (not extreme tho).

Everything seems to be getting to me, Rachel is off her food, The house work is never ending, The new house is still not ready to move into... the list goes on and on. Oh I have absoutley no sex drive what so ever...

I never thought I would write a post like this, I am really embarrased because even tho I love my daughter I really feel like I wish I waited to have her (if at all). I don't think I am cut out for motherhood.

I don't know how much more of these feelings I can take I just want my freedom back, I just can't cope any more.

nicki.smee
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Posted: 29 August 2006 at 5:02pm \| IP Logged

I was in the same boat as you a while back, everything was geting on top of me.. money, df's dd, ppl dieing etc... i felt like i couldn't cope with it anymore.. Taylor was playing up and Sophie wanted attention.. i even locked myself in the bathroom for ten mins one day so i could get some peace.

There is one thing that totally helped me tho, a day away from the kids, adult conversation, and im affraid to say, its called WORK!! its now become my safe haven, home is a war zone and work is somewhere i can escape to.

Have you tried just getting away for the day with a few friends?? retail therapy, day at a spa or just going for a dinner and a chinwag.

Anyhows, i thought i would be stuck in the place of stress and anxiety.. and not being able to cope, but it really does get easier, especially if your dp helps you out.. takes Rachel for a while so yu can have a long relaxing bath, or just lay in ur bed with a book.

So im gonna shut up now, im waffling on and not really helping out much..

Hope you feel better soon x x x

19731hazy
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Posted: 29 August 2006 at 5:08pm \| IP Logged

I think that you have become bogged down with the daily grind and you need to find out who YOU are again. Having kids is great, but so lonely at times.

Vickimom
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Posted: 29 August 2006 at 5:19pm \| IP Logged

Awww martha where do I start????? I still feel like that every so often! I found writing a diary helped! That way you'll be able to see whether there is a pattern to when your feeling good or bad. The other thing to do is start small! Give yourself one task to do i.e hoovering if you can get that done, and nothing else, then you have done well. Don't give yourself too much to do, and don't expect too much. And I also agree you do need a day for yourself. If you have got someone who can have lo for a day make the most and just go off and do something for you, even if it's just wandering around shops window shopping(if thats what you like doing) . I have found that just going for a walk down the track makes me feel better. pm if you need to, but even with having 5 kids, it's not much better, I struggled with just Fred every so often, and just took him down to my mom's and went out.

steph
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Posted: 29 August 2006 at 5:59pm \| IP Logged

Sounds like its one thing after another after another with no let up! Its hard work being a mum so dont worry yourself about not being cut out for it. I have days when i could quite happily put my kids in a big box and post them far away. Housework is neverending...as soon as I think i'm winning...it all starts all over again. As long as I get the hoovering done (big dog that sheds all the time so has to be done) i'm not overly bothered about the rest. When Isla is at nursery I tend to do a full blitz then. As I dont have her under my feet and I can do the stuff that has been irritating me. As Vick said, start small and take it from there. Hate to tell you this but the freedom side of things is um out the window so to speak as well as the identity. For years i've been tasjas mum and now its islas mum...one of these days someone will call me by my own name. I do get wound up by the house (four wall syndrome) and if the kids have been brats all day. When Joe gets home from work and they have both been put to bed. I get my coat on, shoes on and drag the dog out for a reeeeaaalllly long stomp it off walk. That way I get some time to myself and I can ignore the world, it always makes me feel better. I find that when Joe is away thats when its the hardest as their is no chance to escape the house minus the kids. Mind you, he is kind of used to me just taking the pooch out for a few hours after a day or two of him being home. Chin up, it does get easier.

superstar
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Posted: 29 August 2006 at 6:07pm \| IP Logged

how old is your lo? it maybe a touch of post natal depression? my pnd took almost a year to kick in and finally take its toll, just wondering if it could be that, maybe you should go to the docs and see what they say hun, hope ive helped. take care and let us know. XXX

MUM2MAXTOM
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Posted: 29 August 2006 at 6:58pm \| IP Logged

I was going to say the same as Star. It does sound alot like pnd, and it's nothing to be ashamed about. There are plenty of peeps on here with it whom I'm sure will only be too happy to help you. Furthermore, if things are really that bad how about seeing the doctor for a chat?

Hth. Zo xx

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