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Terrible Teens

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Forum Start Madmums | Pregnancy and Parenting Forums » Parenting Forums » Terrible Teens

daughter 16 and pregnant Topic: daughter 16 and pregnant

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offline shirl
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 12:54am | IP Logged Quote shirl

I'm at my wits ends... I need to talk to someone who has been thru this.  She wants to move out--can't stand Dad anylonger. 
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offline jennypenny
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 1:26am | IP Logged Quote jennypenny

Hiya Shirl, and welcome to madmums..

I'm sorry hunni but I don't any experience of this yet as my two are only 6 & 4 but I'm sure there are other mums who have been in the same position..  I don't know what time it is over there but most of us (the sane ones anyway) are in bed as it's 1.20am here.. I'm sure they'll get in touch tomorrow..

Do you think it's something they could sort out together? with you (or another family member) as a mediator? I really feel for you hunni, you must be having a really tough time of it...  How far on is your daughter? Do you think maybe even asking her dad to be more patient will help? (after all, her hormones will be all over the place with her age never mind the pregnancy)..

Please keep checking in hunni, we're all hear for you (even though we might be asleep when you're awake)... we have another few ladies registered in the states too so maybe they'll even get in touch.. 

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offline jopsy
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 7:45am | IP Logged Quote jopsy

hello

as upset as you all may be she needs support, as this will be a major life change

is there anywhere locally she can live so that you can see her regularly?ie at grandparents

Is she still at school? if so it may be worth speaking to them as they will have councillors

hugs jo x

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offline doubletroublewitty
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 8:34am | IP Logged Quote doubletroublewitty

Hi hun i can't imagine what you must be going through.

My girls are only 2 so too young.

Like Jopsy has said she will need all the support you can give her. I can imagine your not happy but whats done is done. Now all you can do is advice and support no matter how angry and sad you are.

Sending you hugs hun xxx

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offline chappiesgirl
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 1:58pm | IP Logged Quote chappiesgirl

welcome to a lifeline....

i'm new in the last 24 hrs but already have found the site invalauble. i am mum to maddie sis and cooking daughter no. two but i'm stepmum to lucie who is 16. whe i first met lucie i was someone who would lay down the law and shout the odds at times but i found that got me nowhere. it normally transpires that the more we rant and rave the more determind they are to carry out their wishes, rightly or wrongly. i'm assuming that this is an issue, an understandable given the circumstances. is it possible that dad is acting like this and you're piggy in the middle? it's his little girl and a normal reaction albeit unhelpful from dad. i woukld try and explain to her to give dad a chance as he may suprise her and of course let him know that this is his moment to shine as well. see if that will help allieviate part of the situation. i would also try local teen mum support groups and askthe pastoral care dept at school to se how they can support you all. i'm sure there are consellors that can help you all. good luck. we're all here for you.

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offline shirl
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 2:26pm | IP Logged Quote shirl

thank you all for your concerns. Its just a sad situation. We have only known for about 1 month now.  Dad is Dad, hurt and somewhat disappointed.  The temperment has been before this pregnancy however it has just escalated from there.  She wants all freedom now no matter what.  She still lives at home and is still growing and learning herself.  Yep I am piggy in the middle. I'm confused.  Have two older children.  One married and pregnant herself which the 16yr old feels some resentment towards and a son 19 yrs who has some health issues.  School is a public school where there is not much support at all.  :(  I hurt so inside I don't know what we have done as parents to make that wrong turn.
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offline bumpsmumbec
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 3:20pm | IP Logged Quote bumpsmumbec

Hi Shirl.  Im not much help, but just wanted to send you some support.  I am 22 years of age and I know that when I was 16 I wanted loads of freedom but without the responsibility.  How far along in the pregnancy is she? xx

Sending you loads of virtual hugs xx

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offline shirl
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 4:06pm | IP Logged Quote shirl

thank you...  12 weeks yesterday...  I've accepted it and want to move on but there is so much going on right now.
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offline jopsy
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 4:24pm | IP Logged Quote jopsy

you really can only take one day at a time

if you can get her to learn about what a life change it will be it might help later on?

just come on here to tell us how youre feeling if it helps

hugs

jo x

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offline steph
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Posted: 08 March 2007 at 4:52pm | IP Logged Quote steph

awww mate, I remember what I was like when I was 16, and cripes I hope my pair dont do half the stuff I got up to.  I was 21 when I was pg with my first, and my dad still went off on one at me...even though Id left home at 17!  Dads are dads, and I suppose thats their job to be like that.  Im dreading what my hubby will be like as the girls get older, and want certain freedoms.  Don't think he will be a happy chappy about it put it that way.

Not a lot I can say, except for as and when you need a rant, pile on here, and rant away

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